Tuesday, July 04, 2006

The Mystery of the Tasties

Due to popular demand, I'm finally posting pictures of the famous Tasty signs. To the left, you will see Ricardo McArt and Trucke 1021432. Say hello boys.

The story of how I came to posses the Tasties is a long and fabled one. It all started several years ago, when Erin (also known as Eagle Eyes Erin) began spotting these Tasty signs all over Utah valley, mostly nailed to street signs. The Tasties had extremely short life expectancies, as anytime we'd try to go see one, it would already be gone. The Tasties seemed to disappear for a few years, but our intrigue was peaked and they were sadly missed.

Until one fateful day last fall, when Erin called me in the middle of the afternoon, bursting with excitement as she breathlessly told me the best news : Tasty had returned. And there was much rejoicing in the land.

Tasty had been spotted on a speed limit sign on the way up Provo canyon. We knew our window of opportunity was brief, so plans were made to rescue Tasty that very night. Dressed to the nines in our warm comfies, Erin, Janay and I began our ascent into the canyon. Sure enough, there was Tasty, nailed to a sign just before a dangerous curve. We parked the car on the side of the treacherous highway and while Janay stood guard, Erin and I darted across the road. It was not unlike a game of Frogger, as we barely escaped with our lives.The end result was worth it, because now, two Tasties are on proud display in my living room. (The 2nd Tasty was found just outside Barbie's old apartment, south of Center street in Provo).

But the mystery is more mysterious than ever: Who makes the Tasties? What do they mean? Who is Ricardo and McArt? What do the numbers mean? I have begun my quest to find the answers, starting with the closest thing I have to a code breaker: my company's I.T. guy, Adam; and a designer who works with my sister, who will be known only as Senor Lightning Bolt so as to protect the names of the accused.

First I approched Adam with the question of numbers. I figured that since he knew the formula for finding the circumference of a circle, he must know some other crazy stuff about numbers. When I showed him the pictures and explained my theories, his reaction was a bit less that what I'd hoped for. He balked at me and seemed offended that I would assume him to be some kind of mystical code breaker. Well excuse me, Mr. I.T. guy.

Next up was the designer. I emailed him the pictures and also explained the back story. Senor Lightning Bolt gave me more feedback then most. Our conversation was as follows:

senor lightning bolt: ok... so we know this person is untrained in the arts.
bonejunior: we do?
senor lightning bolt: um. yea.
senor lightning bolt: totally.
senor lightning bolt: needs heavy meds and a good woman
bonejunior: how do you know its a guy
senor lightning bolt: just a guess. linework is too coarse for a woman. also... most women probably wouldn't add the adam's apple. could be a woman though. women also tend to draw clean-shaven men.
bonejunior: what do you think it means?
senor lightning bolt: i think it means Utah is a boring state to live in.

Thank you, senor lightning bolt, for astutely discovering what most of us already know about living in Utah. Undeterred, I continued to pick the designer's brain for more theories. I suggested that maybe the numbers actually corresponded to letters. His response:

senor lightning bolt: which would spell what?
bonejunior: i have no idea.
senor lightning bolt: we're getting close now!
senor lightning bolt: if i'm ever kidnapped... i don't want you looking for me.

I think we've made it clear that I'm not cut out for the life of a code breaker, or any other job that involves solving puzzles more complicated than the questions on The Cash Cab. The designer did have some good ideas about checking out local art stores for info. But I'd much rather just blog about it and ask you all for your ideas and theories. This is one mystery that I won't let stagnate!!

Here we see the rare Tasty in detail: notice the strange markings and trademark symbols. Are we on the border of copyright infringement here? Isn't it exhilirating to be tap dancing on the brink of legality?


Andi Mae said...

I think the Trucke Tasty is Kate Bosworth. Two different colored eyes? C'mon now. Add that to your clue pile.

barb said...

i think the combination of the names ricardo and mcart is highly irregular. i mean- an irish mexican... who ever heard of such a thing??
as for the numbers... i think they correspond with addresses to underground rave parties around provo. they're probably serving red punch and white cookies there.

Bone Junior said...

I like the Kate Bosworth theory... very clever. And I'm going to have to decifer the addresses to these underground rave parties, because count me in!

The Rules said...

How very odd, and yet delightfully intriguing! So just how big are these things? Are they painted on canvas? Hmmm...

P.S. Rock the Cash Cab!

Bone Junior said...

These questions are difficult for me to answer, seeing as how I have absoultely zero perception of size or painting materiels. I'll try my best and go with what I know:
The Tasties are each on a piece of hard but thin wood, about the size of .... 18 inches tall and 11 inches wide. Roughly.... I'll have to consult my resident artist expert and report back.