Thursday, May 01, 2008

Things I Love Thursday

1. Our company got a flier two weeks ago that advertised a "Customer Appreciation Breakfast" for a supplier that we use regularly. The breakfast was this morning, and I'd been looking forward to it for the entire two weeks that the flier had been up. At 8:30, Jamie and I loaded into the mustang and headed to the address that was listed. *Note* The flier had only the street address, no city. We spent approximately 40 minutes driving to the street address in every adjoining city, talking on the radio to other superintendents who were also trying to find the location of said breakfast; only to finally call the supplier and find out that the breakfast was at their Cedar City location. Translation: three and a half hours away. I love this.***

2. After six weeks of haggling, hassling, and general haberdashery, I finally snapped and channeled my inner ghetto hoochie mama on the phone with the car dealership. Everyone around me saw it coming, they're just surprised it took me so long to finally lose it; I was a ticking time bomb of fury, and the fact that six weeks after I ordered and paid for personalized plates, the dealership hadn't even ORDERED the plates through the DMV was the straw that broke this camel's back. And by camel, I mean bull-headed, stubborn, confrontational Aries that has had. It. Up. To. Here. And was about to blow like the Godfather.

This was the last thing on a list of crap that the dealership has yet to make good on. Namely, I still have no racing stripes, I still have no customized grill piece, I still have no personalized plates. Translation: I spent twenty minutes on the phone, bobbing my head, jabbing my fingers in the air, and yelling at the top of my lungs at the dealership. I cannot remember the last time I was this livid. Miraculously, I did it all without swearing once. I have no idea how this happened. All I know is that I have been seething and foaming at the mouth ever since.

If something doesn't happen pronto, I am not above marching in there in my 4-inch stiletto heels and hoop earrings, and leaving stab marks up and down someone's back. I will cause a scene and I will go all ghetto-confrontational on their ass. I love this about myself.

3. It's the first day of May, and it's snowing. I love this.***

4. Jamie challenged me to a bet that's worth lunch: I have to wear high heels to work every day for a week. Why? Because I was telling her how each pair of my heels has it's own clear plastic shoe box that is stacked on the top shelf of my closet and that there were at least twenty-five pairs. Her response was that I always wear the same shoes over and over. My response was that I have to wear sensible shoes because I never know when I'll be on a job site and if I teetered onto a job site wearing stilettos I'd look like a whore. Her response was to bet me that I couldn't wear heels every day for a week. I stubbornly accepted.

Today is day two of the bet and I really am wearing 4-inch stilettos, as referenced in the above stabbing threat. These are by far the trampiest heels I own, and I'm not above wearing them to work. My feet are killing me. I love this.***

***And by love, I mean that I'm PMSsy and everything pisses me off today, especially these things.


Scratch Subtle said...

The next time the dealership gives you crap start in with a "I will smash your face into a . . . into a JELLY" then follow it up with a resounding "YOU ARE THE ONE THAT IS UGLY!" This works particularly well when least applicable to the situation.

Josh and Gloriana said...

i love you

Tarable said...

I love your spin on T.I.L.T.

Erin said...


and I wouldn't go stabbing anyone in your 4 inch stillettos, I would save that for the day you are wearing at least 6 inches. Because with 6 inches you know you got um good, good enough that they probably won't be getting back up anytime soon. with 4 inches, you run the risk of the yolk sac just getting slightly punctured and then being really pissed off and coming back for retaliation. just a thought.