Bone Junior, on the phone to Bone Senior, voice warbling and lower lip trembling: Sister? Something terrible happened...the most humiliating, embarrassing moment of my life...I just want to die...
So Saturday we did the Race for the Cure, and we actually ran some of the way. A major accomplishment for me, because I'm an avid non-believer in running. And after you hear about what happened at the race, I think you'll become an avid non-believer as well.
But once we started walking and were being passed by runners, I figured what the hell and we all ran for about three minutes. By then I was pretty winded, so we walked and decided that we'd sprint across the finish line in a final burst of hurrah, but would walk until then. Sounds good to me.
Unbeknownst to me, Nicole (who is 6'1" and all legs) had decided that when she crossed the finish line, she was going to jump up and kick her feet together out to the side, a la her celebratory jig. We were within mere feet of the brightly painted pink line on the ground. This was my moment. I finished! I did it!
I did the splits as I slid across the finish line.
This was my big moment, my big accomplishment, and of course I had to be "that girl who fell and slid across the finish line."
Day OneI look forward to sharing more pictures as both my bruise and humiliation continue to develop. My only comfort is that maybe someday I'll see myself on America's Funniest Home Videos. Show me the money.