Everyone who knows me knows this: The only thing I love more than the Philadelphia Eagles is Elvis. Even people who don't know me know this, because they can see the life-sized Elvii in our front windows. (Elvii is plural Elvis.) (I'm lucky enough to have roommates that tolerate this)
When the subject comes up in conversation, the first thing people say is, "Oh, you're an Elvis fan?" I feel a little retarded for myself when I explain that I have not one, but two Elvis clocks. My bedroom decor consists entirely of Elvis posters, including a collage that I made out of a deck of Elvis playing cards. That last April Fools Day, I convinced my two roommates that I'd been recruited by Elvis Presley Enterprises to play Priscilla in the Las Vegas show, "Elvis & Priscilla 4-Ever" because of my "striking resemblance to Mrs. Presley." I still have the fake letter to prove it.
The retarded tingles increase when I tell them that I own more than one book about conspiracy theories surrounding his alleged death. I sang on stage with an Elvis impersonator in Vegas. I spent a week in Memphis for Elvis Week, that I cried when I walked past his grave at the candlelight vigil, and that I plan on going again this year. That Bone Senior hand-made Elvis purses for me that are replicas of his jumpsuits, and that I puffy-painted tank tops.
The next question is inevitably "Why do you like him so much?"
Friends, I don't have enough time to tell you why I love Elvis so much. I just do. Now get off my back.
That being said, I'd like to pay tribute to The King the only way I know how - by hosting a Rockathon and birthday party this weekend, where we will watch all 5 Rocky DVD's and eat Elvis cake. And also by posting some of my favorite Elvis Week 2006 memories for your viewing pleasure.
2 comments:
boring, wise, older-sisterly advice: you could avoid the retarded tingles if you just answered "yes" when they ask if you're an elvis fan...
...and then bust out the hip gyration that got him censored on the tonight show.
how would one become invited to the rockathon or a portion thereof?
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