Monday, December 18, 2006

Call Me Barfa Stewart

There are many times throughout the year when it becomes painfully obvious that I lack what the French call a-certain-I-don't-know-what. One of those times was when I was invited to be a sub at Lez's monthly Bunko group - I won a sixty-thousand piece embellishment set, and had no idea what embellishments were. Another good example is the time I decided to become domestic and make corn.*

But my lack of, shall we say, polish (that's polish as in classy / well-mannered, not Polish like the dogs or the culture) reached another new pinnacle this weekend when I tried to bake cookies.

Here are some examples of the cute, crafty Christmas gifts I was given by co-workers:

Home-made canned peaches...

Cute Christmasy mug filled with love and goodness...

Really cute hand-made Santa thingy...

And then there's my contribution.

I swear I have no idea what happened - I followed the recipe exactly, except I added coconut, which shouldn't have made the cookies turn out like greasy, sunken conglomerations.

The picture doesn't do justice, but the entire batch of cookies came out looking like I'd just used them to blot my forehead. If I received them as a gift, I'd probably just throw them away.

I'm sorry, Maggie. I feel like I can never live up to your Martha Stewart-ness.

* Making corn = opening a can of corn and being amazed that all I had to to was heat it up. I believe my exact words were, "You mean I don't have to cook it? Who knew!!"

Feliz Navidad Total: 34
Rocky Balboa Countdown: 2 Days


Andi Mae said...

To be exact, "you're what the French call, les incompetents." Although, I would have eaten them. You almost can't go wrong with anything that has coconut.

Bone Junior said...

Kevin, I'm going to feed you to my tarantula.

Tarable said...

You should just buy everyone bags of chips. Sounds like that's what they like anyways!

barb said...

sarah you're such a DISEASE!!

Erin said...

i think the coconut did make them that neglected to tell me that when you called after this disaster that we shall now call "The Great Christmas Cookie Masacre of 2006"...way to go wayne...but I probably would have eaten them too!

erin's mom said...

Obviously there was something wrong with the recipe!!
We have learned from one of your past blogs that you truly have a nack for planing office parties with men involved!!
And I have tasted your cooking and
loved every bite !!