Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Why Sometimes I Hate Boys Wednesday

DEAR MCBICEP,

I HOPE YOU HAD A NICE TIME IN HAWAII, BUT AFTER TWO WEEKS OF NOT HEARING FROM YOU, I'VE NARROWED THE POSSIBLE REASONS DOWN TO THE FOLLOWING:

A) YOUR FLIGHT WAS REROUTED TO AN ALTERNATE UNIVERSE THAT HAS NO PHONES, COMPUTERS, TELEGRAPH MACHINES OR SOUP CAN TELEPHONES;

B) YOU DIED;

C) YOU LOST YOUR HANDS IN HAWAII AND HAVE BEEN UNABLE TO PICK UP A PHONE OR WRITE AN EMAIL DUE TO THE LOSS OF YOUR OPPOSABLE THUMBS;

D) YOU'RE TRAPPED UNDER SOMETHING VERY LARGE, WHICH, CONSIDERING YOUR SIZE, WOULD HAVE TO BE SOMETHING EXTREMELY LARGE LIKE THE ROCKY STATUE.

IF YOU HAVE IN FACT DIED, I'LL FEEL REALLY BAD ABOUT SENDING THIS EMAIL. OTHERWISE, SOME TYPE OF CONTACT WOULD BE APPRECIATED.

- BONE JUNIOR

PS - I'M MAKING LABELS AS I'M WRITING THIS AND I'M TOO LAZY TO TURN OFF THE CAPS LOCK, SO THAT'S WHY THIS IS IN ALL CAPS.

8 comments:

Janay said...

Leave the all caps. It gives the email and urgency that I like.

Andi Mae said...

I second Yanaj.

But if the Rocky statue did fall on him, could I have it, or would that go directly to you?

Gloriana said...

yeah 2 weeks is not ok...he knows that. maybe cut him loose?

hizznizzle said...

uh uh oh no he dinn't.

girl you gotta cut that scrub loose. let him try'n find anutha lady that'll treat him right.

seriously though that is crap. if you want, me and like 46...better make if 47 buddies will take care of him for you.

p.s. there are no caps in this cause i am lazy as hell.

photography by Mikki said...

Stupid boy... wish I got to see you each day from across the hall!

barb said...

i, too, am lazy as hell.

and p.s.
i think mcbicep is gay- kind of like the guy on 'clueless' that alicia silverstone falls in love with and thinks she's gonna get with and then finds out that he digs guys....
yeah...
like that.

The Rules said...

Please, please, please, please, PLEASE tell me you actually did send this to him. PUH-LEEEEEASE!

Gloriana said...

also please please please please please puuuuh-lease let us know what he writes back!