New Word Wednesday

Goldfish Paralysis (adj.) : Any situation in which a person freezes with a look of disbelief and bewilderment on his or her face, unable to react to the shocking or unusual event that just took place.

Application: Bone Junior warned her co-worker, Joe, that if he didn't stop calling McBicep "gay", she was going to spit a mouthful of chewed up Goldfish crackers all over his face. Joe instead started referring to McBicep as "bi-curious". Bone Junior calmly shoved a handful of Goldfish into her mouth, lightly chewed them, then approached Joe and blew the chunks all over his face. However, when one of the chunks made a pleasant **tink** sound as it bounced off his glasses, leaving a spittle mark behind, Bone Junior lost her composure and burst out laughing. Unfortunately, this outburst caused her to inadvertantly spit the rest of the Goldfish all over Joe's face. The shocked / disgusted look on Joe's face and his inability to do anything but stare at Bone Junior through Goldfish crumb-dusted glasses could only be described as Goldfish Paralysis.