Operation: Save Samuel

There are three things I love: surprises, practical jokes, and my car. When I went out to my car at lunch, I realized that someone had managed to combine all three. The following letter was left on my windshield:

Ransom Note

To whom it may concern:

I have your beloved Samuel...

He is being treated nicely well, now that we have broken his spirit...(he is healing quite nicely).

He will be returned to you once you have met our demands:

- $3,849.96 in unmarked bills and / or coins (or a can of Western Family Toffee Peanuts and a 32 oz. Diet Pepsi, you choose)

- To be delivered at 9:00 am Thursday morning

- To be left in a brown paper bag (not plastic, they are filling up our landfills) under the tree on the north side of the north entrance to the Canyon River Office Building

- Take your cell phone with you. As soon as the delivery has been made you will receive a phone call telling you what to do from there.

Once these demands have been met, you will be instructed on where you can reunite with your creepy friend. Failure to execute these simple tasks will result in the untimely death and disappearance of Samuel...or I'll just cut his hair off.

Yours truly,

Noneofyourbusinesssssssssssss


So. We have a conundrum. Vote to tell me what I should do!